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FACT OR FICTION: When You’re In Bed You’re Dead

If I were to ask you what’s your definition of truly living your life to the damn near fullest you could ever possibly live it, what would you say?

Would you say something like, “If I’m really going to live my life to the fullest, I need to do it ALL, and I’ve got no time to waste. From changing the world to changing myself for the better… ALL of it

Would you say something like, “If I’m really going to live it right I’m going to take every risk that shows up at my doorstep, and whether I totally screw up or I make it happen… no regrets.

Would you say something like, “I’m going to love every person I meet unconditionally with no judgement and no hate. As The Beatles said, ‘All you need is love’, baby.

All this is GREAT. I mean, damn, if you live your life with these kinds of mentalities than you are pretty kickass, badass, amazing, and inspiring in my book. You and I should be friends if that’s the case. 🙂

Lately, I’ve been trying my best to live each and every day from sunrise to sunset with this kind of mentality (after that I go hang with Edward Cullen). I’ve been working my fine behind off on web design projects, walking 50 Miles for World Changers (T-2 Days baby!), writing from my heart, loving from my heart, learning to ride motorcycles, getting pumped for the Fox Road Trip, and everything else that’s on my always-growing Mad To Do List.

But I have to tell you, sometimes I wonder… is it always smart to attempt to  DO IT ALL?

WHEN YOU’RE IN BED, YOU’RE DEAD

I got up to write this at 2:30 AM because I couldn’t sleep. I was laying there in the middle of reminiscing about how much I miss real, authentic Thai food when suddenly this saying popped in my mind. “When you’re in bed, you’re dead.” It’s one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite books, Tuesdays with Morrie.

And so I thought about this saying here for a moment. I think there’s a thin line we can tread on when it comes to this whole being in bed topic.  Because here’s the thing… that “in bed” part of life – the part when we’re not always off doing, doing, doing and going, going, going – those are the moments when we’re able to step back and think about and learn from those old times and enjoy those memories and enjoy the very present we’re in.

GETTING BUSY IN BED

How is it already nearing the end of May? How is it that I’m already 6 months away from my 24th birthday? How is it that I remember clear as day taking off in the airplane to China with no idea of what to expect and now I’ve already been back in the US for 7 months after living there for 12?

TIME FLIES. I love living my life. I love spending as little of my life as possible “in bed”. I love to DO, and see, and create.

But the reason those memories and dates above have flown by so fast is because sometimes I try too hard to do it all. And then I read things like what my buddy Lach Cotter from Art of Audacity said like, “When I’m mindful: I’m happier; there’s less stress; I feel my body; food tastes better; the day is longer; I get more done.” …That’s the truth right there, my friends.

Sometimes, the best thing you can “DO” is nothing or simply be more mindful of everything that’s doing the doing around us. Sometimes the best thing you can “DO” is to simply “lay in bed” (possibly alongside a fine-ass romantic interest with a beautiful smile) and reminisce fondly of the things that you did and the people you did them with, dream of the things you’ll do in life, and think about the person you are in the NOW.

A big part about being Mad to Live definitely revolves around the packed-with-action Verb, TO LIVE, but it also requires the ability to Beto Enjoyto be Mindfulto Feel.

With all that said, don’t forget it is possible to Get Busy in Bed and Outside of Bed.  😉 Don’t forget TO BE.

Question For Comments: What’s been one of your happiest memories in life simply because you were able to turn off the Go Go GO and just Be?

PS: As of this morning we’ve raised over $1,000 for A Mad To Live Project: A 50 Mile Walk for Tomorrow’s World Changers. All proceeds are going to DonorsChoose.org! My walk begins THIS Wednesday! Check out the announcement post, and doing whatever is in your means to support it means the world to these students, even if it is just to share the post with your social circle! Thanks guys!!!!

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When I’m mindful: I’m happier; there’s less stress; I feel my body; food tastes better; the day is longer; I get more done

About Lauren Rains

Hi my name is Lauren Rains. I write about the human experience. Through thick and thin, I’m dedicated to growth, adventure, integrity, and love. The Mad To Live is based on my pursuits, experiments, research, and lessons of challenge and triumph in all areas of life, including being entrepreneur, a writer, a philosopher, a traveler, a teacher, a student, a creative, a friend, a daughter, a sister, a significant other, a stranger and the list goes on. At the end of the day, I believe human beings are here for two reasons: 1.) to love one another with total acceptance, and 2.) to see what we’re made of as we create the possibilities for an abundant life for ourselves and for others. No more bullshit, let's just enjoy our lives.

Share with me what you're getting into that matters to you. It could be stepping into entrepreneurial pursuits, embarking on a journey of the self, making a crazy life change, or even if you're totally stuck. I want to connect with, support, collaborate with, and learn from as many people as possible through this blog (that means you!) Click the *Share* link in the main menu and let's connect by filling out the form.

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  • I think we need those moments of quiet, rest and reflection. If you are go go go all the time, When do you have to to think about what you’ve done and see how far you’ve come? One activity could blur into another and lose it’s meaning. I think it would also become physically, mentally and emotionally tiring. Would you really have time to appreciate any of your experiences?

    • Hey Delisa!!!
      I totally agree, especially with what you said about things blurring together!!! I’ve actually been experiencing this in my own life lately. Lately I bit off more than I could chew and while it’s been a blast, I almost feel like I haven’t been able to take it all in! Hence, the reason I wrote this post to remind myself to step and smell the roses every now and then! 😛

      It’s never a waste of time to just relax and enjoy. As John lennon once said, “Time you enjoyed wasting, is not wasted time” 😀

  • If you are going to go out and live and enjoy all of these things, you need to be at your best and part of being your best is getting enough sleep. It all works together, so don’t skip out on sleep. I too lived in China for a few months and I was worthless walking around Shanghai if I was sleep deprived. 🙂

    • Hey Todd!!
      That’s awesome you lived in China!!! I was in Beijing but I did have the chance to visit Shanghai for several days. Amazing how different those 2 cities are, ya know?
      But as for what you said in regards to this post, rest is essential! Without it, time fies too fast, and before we know it the trip is over!

  • I totally agree with all of this. Too often I try to experience everything. Sometimes to the point that while trying to do everything, I get nothing done in return. Taking a step back and just living without worrying what the next step is, is something I need to practice daily. Thanks for another amazing post lady. Let’s talk soon, yeah?

    • Hey Carli!!!!
      haha I know exactly how you feel!!! I am always thinking about the next step, next project, next hour, next weekend. I’ve gotten pretty good at making it a habit ot step back and just enjoy the present step, but every now and then I get a little carried away that’s for sure haha.
      And YES talk soon is a must!!! I’m just going to keep myself logged in on skype so that way if setting a time gets tricky I’ll just see you on there and buzz you! 🙂

      Anyway, cheers to enjoying the MOMENT with no worries 🙂
      – Laur

  • Meg

    My family recently came to town and I made the effort to be completely open and free with my schedule so that I could spend quality time with them. It was so nice just sitting at the dinner table with no other obligations, no other wandering thoughts on what I need to be doing or should be doing instead. I let go and took in the family time. I also was able to reminisce with my 95 yr old grandfather. It was true happiness. Sometimes, it’s good to just let life comes as it’s handed to you. I am learning that when I load up my plate with too much “stuff” I end up not enjoying it as much. I like days where I can come home from work and say ” I am down to do whatever!” Great post!

    • Hey Meg!!!
      Ah so true! I really loved your comment! 🙂 It must have been so awesome to just sit and listen to the stories of your grandfather. 95! Wow! He knows so much about life… you can’t help but have a lot of answers after living that much 🙂

      Every now and then I’m able to do what you did – just say “this week, I’m just going to give myself the time for Free Time”. It’s usually easist for me when I’m traveling and suddenly it’s not a big deal anymore that I don’t have internet and all that 🙂 Because you’re so right – when we try to fit it all in, it just starts to blend together, and we can’t really enjoy it!!

      Thanks for sharing Meg!!!!
      – Laur 🙂

  • Oh oh oh–I can SOOOO relate to this! You know, once upon a time, I was 24 and in grad school, thinking I had so many years and so much time to fill. I hadn’t really experienced much in life, so my eyes weren’t opened to how much there was to do. I spent so many hours bored, bored, bored.

    Now… I’m within a few months of 37 (egads!!!) and have had a few major injuries over the past few years, one of which is keeping me from doing a whole lot right now (unknown if I’ll return to full capacity). I’m using my personal training mojo to rehab myself, but still, there’s that little voice of mortality. Fear! Uncertainty! Not knowing what’s ahead. And wondering, as many of us do… why the hell is youth wasted on the young? And… I wish I’d known then what I do now! I feel now as if I shouldn’t waste a single precious second, and I’m constantly planning the next adventure. Each moment is a gift.

    To address your point… this past weekend, we had a rare moment of sun in Seattle, which coincided with our 10th anniversary. We spent the evening sitting at the coast, watching the sunset. As we waited for the sun to plop below the horizon, I pulled out a map and started plotting our next roadtrip… and seconds later, realized what I was doing. I then put away the map and enjoyed the moment with him.

    • Hey Brooke!!!

      WOW honestly this is one of the BEST COMMENTS I’ve ever read and I appreciate you sharing it so much!!! I honestly know exactly what kind of moment you’re talking about as you were sitting and watching the sunset alongside someone you love. It’s a good feeling that very second you put away the map and you realize in that moment that you’re enjoying the present. It’s just really special 🙂

      And as far as life goes… oh hindsight… we just can’t seem to escape it! but you are 37 years young, not 37 years old, so I don’t think the youth as gone anywhere 🙂

      • Hey! Thanks so much for the comment!! Interesting, since I was worried about saying too much! 🙂

        I never thought 37 would feel old, either, but once you’ve seen the dr’s office too many times, in spite of living a saint’s lifestyle, you get different ideas. But you can only work with the tools that you have, which is why I’m rehabbing as best I can from my last surgery so that hopefully I can travel the world again, soon!

  • Yikes. I love sleeping and lounging too much. That could be my biggest weakness.

    But if the sun is out, then I have a hard time being idle. I just need more sun in my life.

    • Hey David!!!

      hahha don’t get me wrong… I do too! But my problem has become I almost feel guilty if I let myself lounge too much. That’s not good R&R is a necessity! 😛

      As far as the sun goes… I’m a Vitamin D lover haha. That’s why I moved away from the cold, wintery of the Northeast hah 😛

  • I have to be honest with you I dont think ANYONE can live their life to the fullest every day. Do you know how EXHAUSTING that would be??? That would be suicide. I mean yes we could & we wouldn’t die but its way to much work. I think what people need to do is just be happy with what you are doing in life. Whether its being a good person working an honest job taking care of your family & paying your bills on time or if it is dropping everything to travel the world. I know im on the road now and there are days where I do think wow I had an amazing fucking day but other i think wow I didnt do anything, but at the same time I think im still living my life to the fullest. Those are my thoughts on that as for being dead when you are sleeping for some reason i have always thought that that is when you are the most alive. You are laying there in bed with a million thoughts running through your head and just analyzing everything.

    Again great post… you always make me think!!!

    • Hey Jaime!!!
      You are the best Jaime! I wrote this very post b/c it was late at night and I was just thinking abou tall these memories and travels and friends in my life – I was thinking about all the things that make me feel ALIVE, and in that moment I really felt alive too.
      And so then I started to ponder the whole idea of “doing it all”. Becuase you are RIGHT! We don’t have to do it all everyday…. damn overachievers LOL. It’s so important to just BE, and enjoy.
      It’s awesome that you’ve discovered that and you really get it! There are some people that maybe spend too much time “in bed” and others that spend way too much time out of it… there’s a happy medium I think 🙂
      Thank for sharing your wisdom Jaime!
      – Laur 🙂

  • Hi Laureeeen!

    Oh totally loving this post. Finally validates all our shared naps together! 😉

    Seriously though, it isn’t worth doing so much when you’re not actually mentally there to enjoy it. Imagine while you’re travelling past a beautiful coastline, you’re planning on which train to take next instead of gasping at the blue sea and sky merging into one.

    Besides, what Jamie said is right. NO ONE can live their life to the fullest every single day. Unless of course, lounging around and taking the time to let all the experiences seep in counts as living a fulfilling life. Perhaps it’s more a matter of changing our mindset about ‘living’. Resting is part of living. Without it, the subsequent days will be harder to face. Relaxing is part of living too. It allows you to stop and appreciate what surrounds you and gives you time to count your blessings.

    Good luck with your walk Lauren! Are you still doing the sexy side kick while you stride? 😀 Oh and please do drink LOTS of water while you’re at it. We’re sure you’ll be needing it even if you don’t feel it.

    Tariq and Shaheera

  • Sometimes the most important adventures happen when we are doing nothing more than taking the time to drink it all in and feel it. New experiences are wonderful, but only if we take the time to really live them.

  • I liked this… Thank YOU!!!! I have always been one to hate sleeping, definitely the last one up at a sleep over.. EVERY TIME…

    What you friend at Art of Audacity said is like GOLD. I am to GO GO GO, and that is why life pasts by fast… It is time to slow down, take it all in, enjoy.

    Surfs up,

  • I think a great life is about laying in bed and not worrying if you should be doing something else. Sometimes I get up early sometimes I sleep it, regardless I do whatever I want 🙂

  • Oh this is so true. In my past life, before my Authentic Life, I tried to do it all but not even the good stuff kind of do it all. It was the “be a perfect mom” do it all or keep the house looking perfect kind of do it all. When I got over that several years ago I felt I had to make up for lost time so I got “mad to live” and started doing all kinds of awesome do it all! And then this past year I came to realize that even though i was doing cool stuff I was missing out on moments that often matter more than the grand experience. I think now at 42 (on Saturday) I figured out what is closer to a good balance. I have tons of adventure planned for the summer (my upcoming post summarizes them) but I also “plan” on some free and open time to BE.

    Thanks!

  • This is so true. I have learned that go, go, go isn´t that great unless you take the time to reflect a bit (everyday…a couple moments a day). I love that you referenced Tuesdays With Morrie. It is one of my favorite books. Keep up with all the great projects you are doing. It is an inspiration to see all that you have been doing at 23. It gives me some hope that all is possible with a bit of motivation. (I am turning 22 in a couple months so now I see I have plenty of time to complete and expand my outlook).

  • I constantly fear that time is slipping by faster than I can handle, that I want to do so much more than I’m doing. BUT, I LOVE sleep! I realize the contradiction of these two thoughts but it’s true!

  • Wifey! Fantastic article. Ever since my incident of tearing my Achilles tendon I definitely have come to appreciate all of the things that I was not doing. I am really frustrated everything in my life takes so much longer. I am really excited to get back to walking and being excited to be active. During my immobilization I almost thought of reactivating my Facebook account…. But I did get to see you in some pictures of J and N’s wedding!

  • Hi Lauren! Just wanted to stop by and let you know I’ve graduated! Finally! And then I saw this post and the title screamed at me because actually as I write this, im in bed. Lol! I am without a pc at the moment and am trying to maintain my blog and connections via an Android phone, which seriously lacks when it comes to design and editing. 🙁 Which is the reason I have not attempted our interview for Exposure Worthy that we spoke about. But I still hope the answer is yes?! Unles…maybe… You would consider a righteous guest post on my blog Magic in the Backyard? Email,me! 🙂
    Ok wow I’ve just rambled so randomly just now. Yea, ok so I will look for your email
    Hugs!
    Kellie

  • Ps…to answer the question…
    Moving away from all I knew, on my own and really being with myself and learning just how capable, strong, successful and fearless I could be. I suprised myself!
    🙂